How To Find What Your Story Is Really About
"I write to discover what I know." — Flannery O'Connor
You may know what happened in your life—but do you know what your story is really about?
Those aren't always the same thing.
A divorce may be what happened, but the story might really be about starting over.
Building a business may be what happened, but the story might be about learning to trust yourself.
Losing someone you love may be what happened, but the story might be about grief, faith, identity, family, or discovering how to build a life you never expected to live.
In Episode 18 of The Edit With Holly Totten Writing, Editing, Publishing, we're continuing our series on getting your story out of your head and onto the page by looking for the thread that connects the stories you want to tell.
Because your life contains thousands of stories—but they don't all belong in the same book.
In This Episode
We'll talk about:
- The difference between what happened and what your story is actually about
- Why every good story from your life doesn't necessarily belong in this particular book
- How to recognize recurring themes and ideas in the stories you keep telling
- Why asking "What changed?" can reveal the deeper story
- How the things you had to learn can point toward the heart of your book
- Why thinking about what you want your reader to carry with them matters
- How to find your story's thread without forcing a message or lesson
- Why you don't have to tell your entire life to tell your story
Questions to Help You Find Your Story
As you look at the pieces you've already written—or the stories you know you want to tell—ask yourself:
What keeps showing up?
What changed?
What did I have to learn that I didn't understand before?
What do I hope my reader carries with them after reading my book?
And try completing these two sentences:
I used to think this story was about __________, but now I wonder if it's really about __________.
If someone reads this book, I hope they walk away believing __________.
Don't worry about having the perfect answers. You're exploring, and those answers may change as you continue writing.
The Big Takeaway
You don't have to share your whole life to write your story.
You need to decide which story you're telling, find the thread that runs through it, and choose the moments that help you follow that thread.
And you don't have to understand exactly what your story means before you're allowed to start writing it.
Sometimes writing is how you discover what the story means.
Coming Next
Once you begin finding the thread of your story, another question usually follows:
How do I know what belongs in my book—and what doesn't?
That's where we're headed in the next episode.
If this series has helped you, share it with someone who's been talking about writing their story but hasn't figured out how to begin. And if you have a writing, editing, or publishing question you'd like me to tackle, send it my way.
The Edit With Holly Totten Writing, Editing, Publishing
httep://www.writelynotable.com
Your story without your voice is only words.
